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- Many jokes are associated with college finals, as it is considered a difficult exam for students. It is not only challenging but also a bad experience for those, who have wasted their college years in fun and have not studied properly. Moreover,...
- This should cause enough blood to flow to your brain to answer it yourself. Be creative. Use the integral symbol. A student came for his final college exam, wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, he put on a white mask and starts yelling...
- And then he put his other hand on my other shoulder. I been going to the same office since a little kid, so I feel obligated to keep goin, but lately the prostate exams are getting longer and more painful. Last time he even rubbed my shoulders during the exam I think I should look for a new dentist This joke may contain profanity. The man grabs the dentist's arm, "no way. I hate needles I'm not having any shot! It makes me very sick for a couple of days. I'm not having gas. Exam Mrs. Murphy went to the doctor. When her husband came home, instead of being in the kitchen cooking his dinner, he found her naked in their bedroom admiring herself in a mirror. After receiving an 89 on his English exam, an immigrant mother tries to cheer up her perfectionist son by telling him "You've gotta be positive!
- When he asked about it, she said that her boyfriend attends Harvard, and that he's so proud of it that he never takes off his school sweater, even when they have sex. I told the doctor to take off his ring before insertion. He said, "Ring? That's my watch! A young busty girl was having a physical exam with her doctor. Doctor: OK now, big breaths. Patient: Yah, i know, and i'm only thixtheen Student in the math exam: Will we get partial credit for the steps? Dad- Stop joking. For the first time in my life, I got positive feedback on my exams Too bad it was from the STI Clinic My doctor asked if I wanted a digital prostate exam..
- He didn't mention there were no electronics involved but now I get his point A guy was eating breakfast before a final exam For good luck, he was going to eat one long peice of bacon representing a 1 and two eggs representing the two 0s making a But after he ate the bacon and took a bite out of the first egg, he found out it had two yolks in it. He thought about it for a second a decided not eat the se Their final exam was due tomorrow and they wanted to get some extra time to hopefully enhance their grades.
- I just hope my patients don't realize im a dentist. A guy goes to a mental hospital for a psychiatric exam. The doctor shows the guy an inkblot image. Doctor: "Look at this card and tell me what you think it is. Daughter: I got one point more than the class monitor. Mum: How much did the class monitor get? Daughter: She got 96 Mum: How much did you get? Daughter: I got 9. My offline exams are starting. My Australian friend failed his aboriginal music exam So I asked him, "Did you redo it?
- He didn't make the cut. I messaged my ex on the day before my exam. I asked if she had any good cheating tips This joke may contain profanity. This is what I'd call a real penetration test. Prostate exam A man goes to his doctor for his prostate exam. The doctor keeps searching and finds a large amount of notes and coins at different amounts. After he's sure he got everything out, he counts it all up. I had forgotten my dentist had retired last year so I was a little surprised to see a new dentist waiting for me who, come to find out, had just graduated from dental school in russia.
- After exchanging greetings I sat down and he began his exam. As he was working I casually looked over at his wall d He walks into the doctors office and nervously asks "Doctor this is my first time, where should I leave my pants? When you feel both the doctors hands rest on your back. I'm doing a course to become a pest controller. Did really well in my exam today Got a bee. Just had my first ever prostate check. My doctor said it's called a digital rectal exam. Felt more like it was anal-og to me though. A chemistry professor posted a bonus question to an exam: Is Hell exothermic gives off heat or endothermic absorbs heat? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window.
- He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing? Upon entering, he notices that the new patient is nervous. While putting on the latex gloves, he decides to break the ice with some small talk. The doctor says, "There is a plant in Mexico full of latex tha Student: "Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject? Otherwise I would not be a professor!
- If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my grade as is and go. If you howev Almost every student put their pencil down except for one student who was adding to their last answer. When the other students had handed in their tests the late student When they returned to class the next day they explained to the professor that they were unable to get to class the day before due to a flat tire and no cell phone coverage in th Verbal history exam The professor asks the first student "Comrade, what ideology does your father follow?
- The teacher was clearly vexed by the cheeky reply and decided to make sure to do everything in his power to The g-raph. Four college students decide to get drunk the night before their final exam. They get so drunk they wake up late and completely miss their final. The four students go to their professor, and explain this elaborate lie that when they were on their way to the final that their car the tire went flat. They beg for a retest, and the professor agrees. On the day of the make It wasn't hard. I failed This joke may contain profanity. So he brings up the issue with the wife, explaining Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about? Apparently, Ron Jeremy was not the right answer. I think you mean oral sex! Temel enters a multi-choice matriculation exam. He flips a coin for each question and picks the choices accordingly. If l got 50p If l got 50p for every maths exam l failed.
- After the doctor left the exam room from my prostate exam The nurse came in with three words I didn't want to hear "Who was that? I had no idea it was a Level 5 course. What is the worst thing to feel when getting a prostate exam? Two hands on your shoulders When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school. At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange letters 'PNEIS' and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect. Why did the bed fail the art exam? He drew a blanket So I went in for my prostate exam The guy put on the glove and started to go up in me. It went on for quite a while.
- Work Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic? As you study for exams, remember its not the quantity it's the quantity. And remember there is no substitute for pure unadulterated bull Dr. Schambaugh is known for asking questions such as, "why do airplanes fly? Support your answer with proof. One student, however, wrote the following: "First, We postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, then you will go to hell.
- Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. Two options exist: If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose. If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the quote given to me by Theresa Manyan during Freshman year, "that it will be a cold night in hell before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I still have NOT succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then Option 2 cannot be true Thus, hell is exothermic.
- Well, this poster came up with some actual worthwhile answers. Here they are. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek. The proper response is: "G'day mates! Yahoo Serious will be out in a few moments. While you're waiting, I'll just throw a few shrimp on the barby for ya, and you can help yourselves to a few pots of Foster's. Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory. The only problems would be from the car sales people and lawyers on why they can't get to the promised land. The lawyers will try to appeal, and the sales people will try to finance or trade one another for less than blue book to get in. The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed in your desk.
- You will also find an instruction manual printed in Swahili. In ten minutes, a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision. Call management in room. Inform management that engineering has had enough of cleaning up after sales demos and will not tolerate this shit. Storm out of room leaving bewildered management to deal with dissasembled rifle and hungry tiger. I mean, if management had been on the ball, the gun would be assembled and the tiger would have been fed.
- This joke may contain profanity. She tells the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for a serious injury or illness, or a death in the student's immediate family. One smart-ass jock in the back of the room asks, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion? When silence is restored the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says, "Aw, that's so sad. Guess yo But after he ate the bacon and took a bite out of the first egg, he found out it had two yolks in it. He thought about it for a second a decided not eat the se Almost every student put their pencil down except for one student who was adding to their last answer. When the other students had handed in their tests the late student They get so drunk they wake up late and completely miss their final. The four students go to their professor, and explain this elaborate lie that when they were on their way to the final that their car the tire went flat.
- They beg for a retest, and the professor agrees. On the day of the make He showed up at 3pm, looked at the test paper and said, "Looks like I'm gonna need a pen for this job. I'll have to pop round to my suppliers for one. Be right back. It wasn't hard. I failed I failed my final exam on Greek mythology.
- It's always been my Achilles elbow Four students plan to arrive late to their final exam so they can take it the next day By the time they arrive the exam is almost over, so they head over to the professor to ask if they can take it the next day. They tell him they tried their best to come on time, but their tire blew out and it took too long to replace it. The professor tells them, "Don't worry about it. You ca The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist.
- Finally, they agreed to the same story: a tire was blown in the middle of nowhere at mid night so they were stuck. They each sent the professor an email asking to retake the exam and gave the excuse. The understanding professor But they've chosen to spend the week partying instead. So, in their drunken stupour, after realising how badly they messed up, they beg their professor to give them an extra day for the exam. Even though sceptical, they told him that they had a flat tire on the way to university and couldn't reach c He races out of bed, gets dressed, and is out the door in 5 minutes. He quickly gets to the lecture hall, and sits down just in time to receive a test.
24 Exam Stress (Humorous Images) Ideas | Humor, Funny, Bones Funny
Unbeknownst to him however, he had run to the wrong room: the Law lecture hall. The student reads over the first question, assured in hi It was a makeup makeup test. A large college class was taking a timed final exam As time wound down, the prof counted down, 10 minutes, 5 minutes, 1 minute As all the other students walk up and lay their tests down on the profs desk, one student in the front row kept writing. The prof said, " put down your pencil. John agrees to investigate. The professor has finished going over the material for the exam and turns to her class before releasing them. Prof: "Alright guys, this is the big one, if you don't pass the exam you'll fail the class. Also, you must be on time. Short of a sudden family death or extreme spontaneous illness, y Louis to party with friends. However, after partying all night, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Springfield until early Monday morning.- Rather than taking their history final then, they Exasperated by the student's abysmal performance up to that point, the professor asked the student "So, what 'do' you know about topology? They laughed, they hit on cute girls, they partied hard. They had a final exam Monday morning, so late Sunday night t He said there would be no excuses for not showing up tomorrow, except a dire medical condition or an immediate family member's death. One smart ass, male student said, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?
- After the laughter had subsided, the teacher g In an orgy, you fuck and then get tested. In a final exam, you get tested and then you're fucked. Competition to be a CIA Agent. For the final exam, the CIA agents placed the candidates in front of a metal door and handed them a pistol. Then they say to the Frenchman: "Behind this door you'll fin Good thing I have been practicing my origami. A gynecologist decides it's time to hung up his speculum. A gynecologist who had lost interest in his medical practice decided to change careers and enrolled in auto mechanic school.
Joke For Tuesday, 17 March From Site Jokes Of The Day - Final Exam
He performed well in the course but was still shocked when he got an off-the-chart on his final exam. He asked the instructor to explain the grade. One day after seeing an advertisment for an auto mechanic school on TV, he decided to sign up. The Dr studied very hard and gave it the same level of excelence as he did when practicing medicine. The day of the final exam came. The Dr had A woman gynecologist decides she wants to become a mechanic. She enrolls in a technical college and becomes an A student. When she receives the results of her exam she sees the Their final exam was due tomorrow and they wanted to get some extra time to hopefully enhance their grades. I was 5 when I heard this lol There was a young man Fredrick in the last course of his psychology major. His final exam was to assess the mental conditions of 3 patients down in the deepest depth of the mental ward.- It was With his clipboard in hand, he walks down the dim lit hallway and gets to a giant metal door. When they returned to class the next day they explained to the professor that they were unable to get to class the day before due to a flat tire and no cell phone coverage in th The question directed: 'Give four advantages of breast milk. He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best: He left his practice, enrolled in a car mechanics class and studied hard. The day of the final exam came and John worried if he would be able to complete the test with the same proficiency as his younger classmates. The exam was also strictly timed. When I say put your pencils down, you must do it, or you'll immedi Her final exam was taking apart a car engine and putting it back together. When she finished, the instructor announced that she scored a on the exam even though it was only out of When she asked how she scored so high, the instructor explained that she got the full points for her work o He does a bit of research and settles on trying his hand at being a mechanic.
- He attends mechanic school diligently and pays attention in the hopes of being the best mechanic in town. After taking his final exam, he notices a mistake with the grade on the test and asks the teacher. This must be a mistake! The exam consists mainly of true or false questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin. He went over to a table where a body was lying face down. He removed the sheet over the body and to his surprise he found a cork in the corpse's rectum.
- Figuring this was fairly unusual, he pulled the cork out, and to his surprise, music began pla For the final exam, the professor announced the challenge of the year: he wanted the students to write something confident. Something that really meant "no worries. The next He'd always enjoyed tinkering with engines, so he enrolled in a school for car mechanics. When the class ended, the students were given their final exam: strip a car engine completely and reassemble it in perfect working order. A Gynecologist became fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO paperwork, and was burned out.
68 Final Exam Humor Ideas | Humor, Bones Funny, Just For Laughs
I remember getting my A level results really clearly, best wishes to all those who just got their results. Of course, these jokes as normal come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Just go an A, a C, a D and a C in my A Levels and have been accepted by a university in Yorkshire. Im on a highway to Hull. A friend passed his degree in sound engineering.How I Feel Before My Final Exams | College Memes, Nursing Memes, Humor
He got a A pirate I know just got his exam results. High Cs. Friend of mine just finished his A levels. My calculator stopped working mid way through my exam. Did the tree surgeon entrance exam. First question had me stumped. Failed my art exam by using the wrong pencil. What sort of exams do witches do? Spelling tests. What exams do vampire teachers set? Blood tests. Disappointed to fail my psychic exam.- Which is why I lost my job as an exam marker. Bit nervous about my maths exam. Think my chances of passing it are If you like these exam jokes, then there is an alphabetical list of joke topics over here. And you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by following us on Twitter or liking us on Facebook.
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